How can we save the Warehouse Theatre in Croydon?

Argh Blogger has changed the layout of this page where I post my blog and I DON'T CARE FOR IT! Changing fonts in self defence.

So this week's sad news from the Croydon Guardian is that the Warehouse theatre in Croydon is in administration. So, you may ask, why is a nice little theatre right next to East Croydon station in trouble? Here's what I think:


Why is a nice little theatre right next to East Croydon station in trouble?


1. Because of cuts to Arts Council funding 
Remember the Arts Council having to cut everyone's funding because the government decided it cares more about the people on the Times Rich List than the UK's position as a leader in the world of arts and theatre? So it kept funding amazing big places like the NT so people wouldn't get too angry and instead cut off the life blood of smaller local projects that it thought fewer people gave a crap about. If you don't remember you should have been paying more attention.


2. Because Croydon Council decided not to fund it either 
Because Croydon Council have higher priorities like their own pay rises. Also they are only really interested in helping out Fairfield halls because that's the place that makes the money (largely it seems to me by billing racist comics and sick 'mediums' who con large amounts of cash out of the bereaved by pretending they can talk to dead people because there are some people in the world that hell, if it existed, would be simply too good for. But I digress.) Also isn't Fairfield where the wives of people in Croydon Council work? And isn't one of the Councillors on the board there or something? That might be wild speculation which is allowed because this is a blog but ANYWAY the Tories in charge of Croydon, like the ones in charge of the country, only consider the arts worthwhile if they make money or win votes, preferably both. Fact.


3. Because The Warehouse Theatre is sitting in a building site
That can't be good for business. The situation as I understand it is that the Council tried to move the theatre but they elected to stay put. So they were promised a swanky new building as part of the redevelopment. The redevelopment hasn't happened (so far) because they can't sell/rent the office space because Croydon is already basically a graveyard of empty offices. So the theatre has been housed in a run-down building in a building site for years and years. It looks like that old bloke's house at the beginning of Up. Sadly, it seems they can't afford any balloons.


4. Because The Warehouse Theatre is badly run
This is based on my experience of the Warehouse which is limited. The reason my experience of the theatre is limited is because it is badly run. I go to the theatre A LOT. I live in Croydon. Take a look at how many of the 52 plays I saw last year were at The Warehouse, the closest theatre to my house. ONE. It's not for want of interest. I went to see a play there right at the start of the year. Looking for ways to see 52 plays over the year, I spotted a poster that said they were looking for Front of House volunteers. I spoke to the lovely lady at the desk, explained that I lived just up the road, had previously worked as a Front of House usher at Chichester Festival Theatre and would love to volunteer. She seemed interested and took down my details to pass on to her manager. I never heard anything. I went back and repeated this process three more times, spoke to three different people all of whom said someone would get in touch. Nothing. Why put a poster up? 


Hearing nothing from the theatre is something I have got used to. I don't get any emails from them (I've booked online so must be on their list) I spend half my life on events websites and never see them mentioned. They have never requested a review from RemoteGoat (unlike most other local fringe theatres like the Brockley Jack and indeed Fairfield Halls who do so every time they have a professional play on.) I don't see posters or ads, I get nothing through my front door or through Facebook. I go to the theatre all the bloody time, I get an email about a new show somewhere in London about every 5 minutes. If the Warehouse are not marketing at me, who are they marketing to?

5. Because The Warehouse Theatre is not engaged with the local theatre scene
Maybe there just isn't the demand for a small theatre showing professional shows just up the road from Fairfield and right next to a station from which you can be in the West End in 15 minutes. OK. But there is a screaming demand for a space that the many high-quailty non-professional Croydon-based theatre groups can hire to perform. Breakfast Cat and Exit have to go out to Carshalton to perform at the Charles Cryer, while CODA continue to bankrupt themselves hiring the Ashcroft.


Why on earth couldn't The Warehouse rent out it's theatre for a week once in a while to these groups? I think their audience would have loved Macbeth. We could have done it for a few nights at the Ashcroft and a few at the Cryer. It would have sold out, we would have paid them for the space AND, importantly, it would have brought to the theatre a wealth of new local audience members who they could have marketed all their other shows, professional and non-professional, to. There is no reason a theatre can't show both quality local theatre and great professional shows. The Spring in Havant might not be perfect but it has a theatre programme The Warehouse should be green with envy at, everything from Brecht from The Bench, improv comedy from SOOP, internationally renowned companies on tour like Faulty Optic, and Proteus and more than one cracking young people's theatre group too. The Spring (or Havant Arts Centre as it used to be rather more sensibly known) and the amazing groups who perform there are the reason I am interested in theatre today.




People reading this might be muttering to yourselves that I don't understand what The Warehouse is about. I'm not the target market. It has a closed membership. Explain it to me. Explain why, for me, this little theatre in my town is not the beating heart of my theatre world. Because I should love it. I should be furious that it is closing. And I am, but I am as furious with them for failing as I am with Croydon Council and the Arts Council and the businesses who are not renting office space in Croydon and the businesses flogging the offices making them too expensive so companies like the one I work for decide we can only afford to operate in East Grinstead and relocate. I have enough rage to go around, believe me. 


The only thing I love about living in Croydon* is the community of friends I have in the local theatre groups. The Warehouse could be a centre for this love and community. It would make people's lives better, it could reduce crime, improve Croydon's reputation, boost the local economy and make hundreds of people happier and prouder to live here. Sounds far fetched, but imagine Havant without The Spring. That should make The Warehouse a priority. So let's save it ...and change it! This is my wishlist for The Warehouse:


What I would do if I was God and could do whatever I wanted with The Warehouse Theatre
- Relocate it to the Croydon Clocktower
- Have a resident non-professional local theatre company who perform there 3 times a year
- Rent out the theatre by the week OR by the hour to local non-professional companies
- Offer a programme of touring theatre companies and professional shows, including popular favourites like Dick Barton and plays which are on the syllabus in local schools 
- Hold live music events
- Extend the existing young people's theatre club to start from age 7, a younger group meeting separately to the older group.
- Hire Stephanie Darkes to market the theatre to the Croydon community
- Relaunch with a Croydon Playwriting competition in which plays written and submitted by local writers are performed by the resident theatre company and the winner is voted by the audiences
- Install a second hand book shop in the theatre with an extensive play section
- Get rid of the local Council and instate some people who cared about the arts and could see the benefit of the above to the local community so they would fund it
- Hire myself to run it all


Anyway that's enough ranting blog for today. If you disagree with my condemnations of The Warehouse, the Council or the Government please do comment. In my opinion the internet is all about creating a massive argument. And your views are as valid as mine, unless or course you're wrong which I'll happily point out for you. Also do you think this font is easier to read?




*Apart from the excellent transport links to London and the rent being cheaper than nicer places.

52 - Aladdin, Ashcroft theatre, Croydon

52 plays!! I realise this might lose impact as I am blogging a few days after seeing this last production of 2011 on New Year's Eve. But believe me dear reader, I saw this (and The Borrowers) in December 2011. Which makes my challenge complete.

I was pleased to see a panto as my final play. You might think a panto is slightly less worthy than some of the other plays I have seen over the year. You are wrong. Pantomime is the greatest example of British culture I know.

Try seeing a Pantomime outside of the UK and you will run into problems. Then try explaining Pantomime to a German, an American, an Indian and witness the look of bemusement.

To me the clever puns, cross-dressing, colour and nonsense you see in a pantomime demonstrate the wit, diversity, exuberance and eccentricity that make up our national identity.

Look back in time and you can find the pantomime's ancestors in mummer's plays and even mystery plays. Look forward and find its children in modern films like Shrek (people think the idea of having innuendo and cultural references for the grown-ups in children's films is new. I'd say American cinema is just catching up.) Naturally as a leftie British person I usually treat patriotism as an embarrassing and rather dangerous disease but actually I do think that our literary and cultural heritage is something we can be proud of.

Now usually I'd advocate forgetting the celebs and patronising the smallest local pantomime you can find for maximum community feeling and naughtiness. But I did think this Aladdin was particularly good in terms of sheer volume of cheesy jokes. My favourite:
"I just saw Michael J. Fox down the garden centre"
"How did you recognise him?"
"He had his back to the fuchsias"

I also thought the set was lovely and glittery, the dancing impressive and the actors full of the essential energy and mirth. Wishy Washy (played by that geeky new bloke from Hollyoaks) was the star of the show, interacting really well with the kids, delivering exposition at roughly the speed of sound and jumping around the stage like a mad thing.

Something I would have liked to see improved somewhat would be the costumes. Pantomime dame costumes can be really magnificent and silly and although Twanky's were colourful I thought they could have been slightly more inventive and daft. The exception to this was the cool ming vase dress 'she' wore in the finale complete with a hat that looked like a lid so she could shrug her shoulders and draw her head in to make her head disappear. That was awesome.


I feel a bit sad now my 52 plays resolution is complete. Obviously I'd like to go to the theatre a lot in 2012 too, but with a new resolution to save some money and go on holiday to India I suspect my theatre trips might become less frequent. When I see something particularly great or awful, I'll definitely keep posting on this blog, it has been nice to practise writing down my thoughts and ideas.

Anyone considering upping their experiences in 2012, I can't recommend the 52 plays idea enough. I can honestly say it is one of the best things I have ever done. I feel like I know much more about theatre than I did 12 months ago, I see plays in a wider context and have a far better idea of what kind of theatre I really love. Instead of setting yourself the usual dull dieting or sporty challenge this year, why not embark on something that will improve your mind instead of your body? Watch 52 films, see 52 plays, read 30 books (52 books seems a bit much to me), go on 52 dates, whatever. Choose something you are passionate about and learn more about the thing that you love.

Above all my lovely blog readers, I hope you find a way to have a happy, constructive and successful new year. Noone else can make this happen but you.

26 - Abigail's Party, CODA

I really enjoyed this production by CODA. The performances were very funny and the set, and in particular the costumes, were spot on.

The person I was with did admit to being slightly irritated by the similarity of this production to the film. However as I didn't remember anything about the film this wasn't a problem for me!

It was a shame the audience was a bit sparse in the massive venue. I think the production would have benefited from a smaller theatre which would have made it much easier to create the atmosphere for a single set character piece like this one.

18 - The Graduate, CODA at the Ashcroft Theatre, Croydon

There were some strong performances in this production of The Graduate which were a joy to watch. Danielle Lautier was an enigmatic and very sexy Mrs Robinson, perfectly cast. Christopher Rudd was engaging as the young graduate Benjamin who she seduces. His wide ranging performance had the right balance of stuttering insecurity and arrogant rebellion. I also particularly enjoyed David Sanders’ performance as Ben’s father Frank which was very funny.

I quite liked the atmospheric set but there were too many clunky and slow scene changes for me which left me feeling like this hadn’t been an entirely successfully adaptation for the stage. The muted palate of the set also made the scenes very samey especially as the characters spend most of the play sitting about talking nonsense.

They just don’t talk or act like real people these characters, and this is a problem with the play rather than the actors in this production. Elaine seems to impress Ben on their first date with her intelligent and sparkling conversation, but later she’s presented as an unoriginal thinker who has simply acted to please her parents all her life. She finds out her mother has slept with her boyfriend, then hangs around drinking with her all afternoon like a world-weary pragmatist. But she isn’t one, she’s supposed to be a relatively naive young women, who surely would react to the news by locking herself in her room, crying and playing pop music.

These undeveloped characters might work in a novel where their changeability and unrealistic nature might come across as existentialism or surrealism. (I can’t be sure, I haven’t read it.) But in a naturalistically acted play they were just irritating.

It felt a bit like this play had been wheeled out by CODA as an audience-pleaser because it was a popular film and men love to see a sexy cougar. But I was less than pleased, because the play pretended to have something clever to say about the human condition and in the end I don’t think it did. I want to see an experienced and well-established group like CODA in the large Ashcroft theatre give me as an audience member a bit more credit and put on some good plays rather than movie blockbusters please. Let’s have some Checkov next time, or better yet some Brecht.

7 - Macbeth - Ashcroft Theatre Croydon

Walking into the theatre to see this production of Macbeth there was a thin cloud of fog in the air, setting the scene for an atmospheric production.

The witches, not as ghoulish as in some productions but quite creepy, were seated on the floor as they were for most of their scenes. This rather static staging meant their performance, while accomplished and interesting, was rather reined back. I don't quite like the modern idea that over the top dramatic and gory witches detract from the play and always find it a bit disappointing when they are just sitting there talking.

I was also slightly disappointed by Banquo's ghost scene, in which Banquo was noticeable by his absence. Instead Macbeth shouted at a spotlight on an empty chair while the others watched amazed. At first I thought, as other productions have done, they would play the scene again after the interval with the bloody spectre visible to the audience this time but this didn't happen. Strange, as this wasn't a production afraid of showing violence, later Macduff's family and Macbeth himself are killed on stage.

A great cast and a well cut script made this production enjoyable and pacy. Christopher Lane as Macbeth shone in the later scenes, emerging through the fog like a demon. His transformation from loyal soldier to inhuman tyrant was electric and highlighted the way his soul had been warped by the act of murdering his king. I didn't think his relationship with Lady Macbeth, played by Joanna Nevin, had much chemistry in their scenes together. However she too really shone in the later scenes and her wail in the sleepwalking scene was heartbreaking.

One thing I really didn't like about the production was the odd lighting. Whenever someone was giving a soliloquy they would suddenly change the lighting and put a spotlight on them. I would prefer a lighting designer to give me a bit more credit as an audience member. Yes. I get it. They are talking to themselves and other people can't hear them. It's not that complicated. And the moment in Macbeth's death scene when he moved and the spotlight had to move with him, rather slower than he did, was just painful. However this would make the play easier to follow for someone less familiar with the text. Other touches, like the army marching in holding actual trees, and the way the text had been cut down, made me think this would be an ideal production for school or college groups, and I hope some will go to this and Romeo and Juliet which the company will also be performing later this week.

There was a really great moment at the end of the production where Macduff stabbed Macbeth with his own crown, then in the next scene placed the still bloodied crown on the head of Malcolm. (Yet another) spotlight highlighted a young Fleance stood stage right looking over at Malcolm. It suggested that the violence in pursuit of power would inevitably continue, a modern twist reminiscent of a thriller film.

Great to have such an enjoyable Shakespeare production on our doorstep in Croydon. Go and see it.

5 - A Fistful of Barton - Warehouse Theatre Company directed by Ted Craig

Every year the warehouse theatre resurrects the character of Dick Barton, Special Agent beloved star of the BBC's first daily radio serial back in the 1940s-50s. Each year is a brand new adventure or 'episode' and they are very popular, running from early December right through February.

So I figured it was a scandal I had never been to see one and went to check it out. It was hillarious fun, kicking off with Dick waking up in the bath. Queue innuedo galore and a song with a rubber duck and loofah.

This was the first of many hillarious original songs, with live music performed by members of the cast. Particularly impressive as most of them were already playing several parts with full costume changes in a fast-paced plot.

A versatile and brightly colourful set complemented the colourful characters. I liked the way part of a totem pole occasionally became transparent when back lit to reveal a BBC radio presenter, complete with dinner jacket and bow tie introducing the next scene.

A talented cast in a silly and engaging production with just the right mix of pastiche and affection for the subject. Definately worth catching next year's!

Have to say £2 for a flimsy programme was a bit of a rip off though.